TO A POINT: The story of three abused women

I couldn't keep from crying last week as I listened to three women speak about how domestic violence has affected their lives. It's tough to take notes when your eyes fill with tears. But it was far harder to hear their stories and learn what they lived through.
Teena Carson spoke first. For 10 years, her life was dominated by fear. The man she loved so much hit her in return. Finally, Carson broke off the relationship. She then lived through the terror of being stalked. Her ex had all the information he needed in the order she filed for protection. It included all the places she frequented. He blatantly disregarded the order for protection and showed up at all those places. One night he called and said he was on his way to her home to kill her. Teena called the police, packed up her two young kids, and met the officer in a parking lot. There the two tried to figure out where he was so he could be apprehended and brought to jail. It took hours. When it was over, the officer encouraged Teena to go to a shelter in the Twin Cities. But it was so far. Instead she returned home, where she was still so afraid she couldn't sleep. Looking back, she wishes she could have gone to a shelter. She wishes there would have been one nearby.
Penny Peters woke up in the middle of the night last summer when her ex-boyfriend crashed his truck into her Rush City garage. He stormed into the house and stabbed her six times all over her body. She lived, but the injuries will never fully heal. It wasn't the first time he'd been violent during the 13 years they were together. But she had never gone to a shelter either. He threatened to kill her pets if she left. And in the middle of the night, battered and hurting, the last thing she wanted to do was drive herself to a shelter in the Twin Cities.
It was June 8, 1996 and Carol Folsom was coming home from a baseball game when her life changed forever. She learned that her sister, Barb, and a friend had been murdered by her ex in Mora. With one bullet left and a child in the yard, the killer chose to turn the gun on himself. Twelve years later, Carol wonders if the outcome would have been different had her sister been able to go to a shelter.
While nothing can change the past, the future of abused women in Isanti, Chisago and Kanabec counties will be different. This year, The Refuge will open a shelter for battered women.
It has long been needed. It is much welcomed.
"We believe this to be a tranquil, peaceful place that women and children can come to to relax," said The Refuge Executive Director Roxie Karelis during an official ground breaking at the site on July 18, 2008. "They can rejuvenate and rebuild their lives."
The shelter is being created in part due to a $200,000 grant from the United Way. The area has never seen a grant that large before from United Way. But the grant alone won't cover all the costs associated with the shelter. The Refuge is working to raise another $150,000. Two benefits will be held within the next few months. Kick up your heels at a cowboy dance on Saturday, Aug. 16, 5 to 11 p.m. at the Cambridge American Legion. There will be a mechanical bull in the parking lot from 5 to 8 p.m. Inside there will be a karaoke contest, line dancing, Best Boots contest, taco buffet and raffle. On Thursday, Oct. 23, head to Chateau de St. Croix Winery in St. Croix Falls, Wis. for an elegant wine-tasting dinner and silent auction. For more information on either event, call 612-379-3580 or email rlindsay@murphyassociates.com. To contact The Refuge directly, call
As for Teena, Penny and Carol, thanks so much for sharing your stories. It took a lot of courage to open your lives up to strangers. But I know it took more bravery to walk out the door.